The Process of Hate

She was a teacher, or rather had been one. She was affectionate
and kindly, and this had almost become a routine. She said she
had taught for over twenty-five years and had been happy in it;
and although towards the end she had wanted to get away from the
whole thing, she had stuck to it. Recently she had begun to
realize what was deeply buried in her nature. She had suddenly
discovered it during one of the discussions, and it had really
surprised and shocked her. It was there, and it wasn't a mere
self-accusation; and as she looked back through the years she
could now see that it had always been there. She really hated.
It was not hatred of anyone in particular, but a feeling of
general hate, a suppressed antagonism towards everyone and
everything. When she first discovered it, she thought it was
something very superficial which she could easily throw off; but
as the days went by she found that it wasn't just a mild affair,
but a deep-rooted hatred which had been going on all her life.
What shocked her was that she had always thought she was
affectionate and kind.